• Divorce,  Faith,  Featured,  life

    Intentional Weakness

    “Intentional living is the art of making our own choices before others’ choices make us.” Richie Norton It started with the divorce. And it seems to have continued with unintentional acts of procrastination, haggardness, and dismal outlook. Continuing my revelations about how divorce has affected me and what the future (God’s plan) holds for me, I came to another realization this last week. I realize I have succumbed to the very worst obstacle to walking out my destiny – my weakness of being unintentional. As if a prophecy had years ago been uttered about how my life would turn out, I’ve allowed fate – life – to determine what has…

  • Divorce,  life

    The Shattered Pieces

    When things fall apart, the broken pieces allow all sorts of things to enter, and one of them is the presence of God. – Shauna Niequist Denial. It’s a poison that many of us like to carry around with us, and it is something that can kill our dreams, those around us, even ourselves if we’re not careful. Unfortunately, denial is the poison I sipped upon for months after my divorce. I thought I was okay. I thought it wasn’t affecting me very much. And that’s the beauty of denial – it’s able to seep down into the deepest roots of our being, blind us to the truth, and destroy…

  • Faith,  life,  Writing

    Christians, Fiction, And Domestic Violence

    Late last week, I posted a fictional story titled Jen Fled. It was a short piece for my ‘The Friday Muse’ segment on my blog where I write a short piece of fiction each Friday to discipline myself in writing on a regular basis and to give my followers/readers something new each week. Jen Fled is a piece about domestic abuse. Domestic abuse is not covered in Christian fiction circles very often – if at all. I can’t remember EVER reading a piece regarding domestic abuse, aside from a brief mention here and there of the victim. Definitely never any pieces that showed actual domestic abuse happening. Christian circles tend…

  • life

    The New Peer Pressure

    Remember when you were in school and your friends would pressure you to do something you didn’t really want to do? Maybe something you knew you shouldn’t do? Smoke? Drink? Cheat? Fight? Back then, it was called peer pressure, when a majority of your peers pressure you into doing what they think is cool. I fell into many peer pressure pitfalls in my youth. Nothing too drastic, but I did get into trouble on occasion. After I exited high school and entered the ‘real world’, I figured all of that was behind me. Then came my young adult years, when everybody and their mother wanted me to drink. Or have…

  • life

    Confronting The Darkness

    “You might try then, as I did, to find a sky so full of stars it will blind you again. Only no sky can blind you now. Even with all that iridescent magic up there, your eye will no longer trace constellations. You’ll care only about the darkness and you’ll watch it for hours, for days, maybe even for years, trying in vain to believe you’re some kind of indispensable universe-appointed sentinel, as if just by looking you could actually keep it all at bay. It will get so bad you’ll be afraid to look away, you’ll be afraid to sleep.” – Mark Danielewski Darkness. It can come in many…

  • life

    Black Sheep

    Most people recognize them by the way they do things – or rather, don’t do things. They don’t conform. They march to their own drum beat. They attempt what has been declared to be impossible. They are the black sheep. When I was growing up, the term ‘black sheep’ was considered derogatory. It meant that you didn’t fit in with society. You were too different to be included. You were the square peg when all that was required of you was to fit in a circular hole. In some instances, you were the ugly duckling of the group. But as I’ve grown, I’ve come to take the term ‘black sheep’…

  • life

    The Powerful No

    Why is it so hard to say no? Throughout my life, I’ve struggled immensely with assertiveness. Or lack thereof. From being bullied, to standing up for my faith, to turning down friends and family when they ‘need’ me, I’ve always struggled with that one two-letter word: NO. It’s such a powerful word, and it can bring so much freedom to our lives, but only if we know how to use it. Back in the day, I struggled with assertiveness so much so that I actually signed myself up for a community college course on Assertiveness Training. I took one look at the workbook and realized I could handle my assertiveness…

  • life

    Calibrate Your Compass

    Have you stopped lately? I mean really stopped what you’re doing, closed your eyes, and breathed in the world for a moment or two? Life is hectic. Bills. Kids. Crisis. There’s enough in a day to throw our compass off, sending us in wayward directions we never intended to go. Stop. Close your eyes. Breathe. Calibrate your compass. Remember why you’re doing what you do. Are you chasing hard after a dream? Are you in this for your spouse? Are you trying to set a better legacy for your children? Whatever it is, remember it. Make sure your compass is pointing in the direction it should be. And go. Repeat…

  • life

    The Hand We’re Dealt

    There’s a great many people I have heard blame their current situation on their past circumstances. They were born into poverty, someone betrayed them in life, or life itself dealt them a bad hand at one point and they never quite recovered. But does any of that really matter? It’s true that our circumstances shouldn’t define us, but it’s hard to walk that attitude out into the real world. At any moment, anything can happen to us. We’re overcharged from our bank account, we run into a medical crisis, or we lose that job we’ve poured a good portion of our lives into. We lose a spouse, child, or friend.…