A Bittersweet Anniversary

Today marks the one year anniversary of my grandfather’s death. Tomorrow marks the eleven year anniversary of my marriage. These two anniversaries have created a very bittersweet atmosphere in my life at the moment.

This day last year, my grandfather took his own life. His death added to an already challenging season – one I still find myself in over a year later. Between our move back to Arizona from the Bay, to my grandfather’s death, to family turmoil, I have asked myself many times what I’m doing here. God’s hand has led me to this place in time, but why have I had to go through the heartache I have gone through? Why did we have to move from the Bay, away from my grandfather right before he died? Why did I have to move back here to a place of desolation and heat, a place where parts of my family have crumbled to pieces?

These are questions that I ask myself when I’m not being distracted by daily life, questions I plan to address and explore in later posts. God has reasons for everything, and even though I may not find out what some (or most) of those reasons are, it won’t stop me from asking the questions in an attempt to find the answers.

Today, though, I want to celebrate my grandfather. My best friend. I know in my spirit that he is in a better place now. Much better. His cancer, his ailments, are gone – healed. He is at peace. And I know he would want nothing more than peace for me and my family. He was my confidant, an old soul that spoke to me like no other could. I miss him, but I know I’ll see him again someday.

Cheers to you “Old Goat”, and to the legacy you left me.


  • Anita Cooper

    {{{hugs}}}}So sorry for your loss, David. God grant you His peace as you remember your grandfather. Just curious – and I mean no disrespect at all – but have you explored the idea of a generational curse being attached to your family? Often it shows itself in “bad luck” and events such as suicide, drug addiction, etc.

    Again, I am deeply sorry for your loss. It’s very hard when someone so close to us leaves this Earth…whatever the circumstances.

    • David N. Alderman

      Anita, yes, I am a firm believer of generational curses and I believe there a quite a few of them in my family tree. Through prayer and discipline, I have been breaking many of them off of my line. And yes, suicide is definitely one of them.

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